Roast Chicken

This is the ultimate home-sickness remedy. Take your FREE RANGE (I really am serious about that) chicken and place it on a chopping board cover the breast with three or four rashers of streaky bacon and into the cavity place a peeled onion. (See photos)

Peel some (the amount is up to you) main crop potatoes and put them in some water to "par-boil". This means that you will only boil them for about ten minutes. Drain these (keep the water ina pot) and allow them to dry a little with the lid off. When they are a little dry pop the lid back on and give the pan a single solid shake. The idea is to rough up the edges of the spuds so that they will crisp up nicely.

Get your oven nice and hot and pop some oil or lard in a roasting dish. (Vegetable oil is ok but lard is better - honestly it is. The best of all, however, is goose fat with duck fat coming a close second). When this fat is spitting hot pop the chuck in the pan and surround it with spuds. You may need to pop some puds in another roasting dish. If you like parsnip (and let's be honest, who doesn't!) peel and cut them into chunks and pop them in now (no need to par boil-them). Close the oven door and pour yourself a glass of wine.

After about 25 minutes check on you roast and spoon a little of the fat over the chicken, having removed the bacon. Also turn the spuds over at this time. Now you must get on with preping your veg. Carrots are a good cheap veg as are all the cabbages in season. Peel an onion at this time and cut it into 4 pieces. Pop the onion in with the other roastig veg and take the bacon of the chicken. The bacon should be crisp and oh so savoury - now you are faced with a huge dilema - should I eat this pre dinner treat with a glas of wine in the kitchen or should I share it? I think we both know which way you should go with this!

After about ten more minutes pop your carrots on to boil. Peel half a dozen cloves of garlic at this time too if you have it in. After a further 15 minutes its time to check the chicken. Slide a knife between the leg and the main part of the body - if it is red at all it needs more time - the photo below needed another 15 minutes.

When your chuck is cooked to perfection take it out of the oven and carefully pop it on a chopping board - cover with a piece of foil and let it "rest." Now the real fun begins. Here's your list -

1. pop all the roast stuff into a single tray on the oven and put the chicken tray on the hob having drained off most of the fat.

2. pop the garlic in the tray in the oven.

3. get your green stuff into the boiling water with the carrots.

4. take a deep breath.

5. turn on the heat under the tray and add a tablespoonful of plain flour - stir it in so it soaks up all the oily juices.

6. add a little of the potato water to the pan and stir like mad then add some more and keep stiring

7. crumble a chicken stock cube into the gravy and keep stiring

8. take another deep breath.

9. by now you should have a reasonably smooth gravy - add a glass of wine and allow it to boil.

Now the fun really starts...

Uncover your chicken and peel off the skin from the breast (this is like the bacon earlier - I leave it to your conscience!) Turn the bird so that its legs are pointing away from you and take a very sharp knife (size and width of blade are not relevent - its all about the edge!) and carve away at the breast aiming to getsmooth clean slices. There is no great mystery, trick or magical rite of passage involved in carving, just old fashioned practice makes perfect.

Plate up the chicken first and then start piling on the other stuff. Drain the veggies from the boiling water and pull everything else out of the oven. Cover everything with gravy, pour another glass of wine and enjoy.

I look forward to the day when as a society we treat the humble chicken with a bit more respect. There are two points here we should first regard this roast as a complete treat and secondly we must use all of the beast - it would be disrespectful to do any other.

Don't forget that every organisation needs a quality control manager!